Why do people think I'm joking when I gleefully cheer impending socialism? I welcome it with open arms and wallet. I emphatically pre-endorse every collectivist policy that President Obama and the Democrat Congress plan to pass.
When universal health care arrives, my health will be the envy of my friends. At even the thought of sickness I will schedule a visit to my doctor. I'll take every drug s/he prescribes until the refills run dry. Headache? Doctor. Stubbed toe? Doctor. Tired? Doctor. Angry at my roommates? Doctor. I plan to take full advantage of such a program and encourage everyone else to do the same. Hell. I'm not paying for it!
Likewise, I will relish in my tax cuts, tax breaks, or any welfare system enacted. If only those making $250,000 or more are to be taxed then I will plan my life accordingly. My salary will cap at $249,999. I'd certainly like to work hard and make more, but we all have to make sacrifices in these troubled times.
The left is right. (See what I did there?) It's about time some of these rich people started paying for my well being. They have so much money. It's absurd. What right do they have to it? The only right any of us really has is the right to obey the majority. Individual rights are as antiquated as the second amendment. I don't own a gun. I've never fired a gun. And I don't plan on owning a gun. So if they're banned, restricted, or taxed, I suppose it won't bother me in the slightest. At least they'll finally be out of the hands of criminals.
Nationalizing the banks? That's fine with me. Why would I care? If it works, it must be right. While we're at it, we should nationalize the car companies so this whole "bankruptcy" thing doesn't happen again. Our government has a great track record with managing money. Or, at least, it will with Obama in office.
Oh, change can you see by the dawn's early change
What so proudly we changed at the twilight's last changing?
Whose broad change and bright hope thru the perilous Bush,
O'er the changes we changed were so gallantly changing?
And the rocket's red change, the bombs bursting in change,
Gave change through the night that our change was still change.
Oh, change change that change-spangled banner yet change
O'er the land of the change and the home of the change?